What Are You Bringing to Your Thanksgiving Dinner?

It’s Thanksgiving and most of us will be gathering with friends and family and considering what we can contribute to our holiday feast.

While we may be planning to bring a favorite dessert or special bottle of wine, keep in mind there is more that we’ll each be bringing to the festivities. We’ll be bringing an energetic contribution too.

Here’s an example of what we mean. Most of us have walked into a room right after two people had a heated discussion and we felt the tension in the air? You could cut it with a knife as the saying goes.

We’re feeling the collective energy of what just happened even though nobody has spoken. The collective room environment is based on the energy of each individual in that room. Similarly, we can walk into a room and feel the uplift when something fun or positive has just happened.

We may feel compelled to ask, “What?! What just happened?!” Then someone breaks the silence and gives the good news. Another example of how our energy extends outward has been documented by researchers at the HeartMath Institute (HMI.) They found when people touch or are in close proximity – there is an actual transfer of energy. The heart’s electromagnetic field (the most powerful rhythmic energy field produced by the body) can be detected by other individuals and can produce measurable effects in a person a few feet away.

Whether we are conscious of it or not, our feelings are emitted into the collective environment. Our individual energy not only affects us, our health and perspective on life, it also contributes to the environment wherever we are. Knowing this allows us to consciously choose to make the most important contribution as we gather at this special time, which is a heart-felt connection, appreciation for each other and all life, and compassion for those in challenging situations that can’t experience this gift or resonance at this time.

As we find ourselves sitting down for our holiday dinner let’s choose joy, kindness and whole hearted fun as we deepen our heart connections with each other. Ocassionally refreshing our commitment to this helps to sustain the moments and benefits of these special times.

Tips on adding more coherence:

  • Take a few quiet minutes to become centered in your heart space. Feel appreciation for something or someone. Let yourself soak in this feeling for a few moments.
  • Set your intention by seeing and feeling yourself maintaining more personal balance each day and in your interactions with others.
  • Call on your heart intelligence. Say to yourself, “If I start slipping into judgments, drama, frustration or resignation I will catch it quickly and I’ll shift back into my heart and reset my inner coherence. (note: Please don’t judge yourself for having a wobble. We all do at times.)
  • Focus in the heart a few minutes before holiday events. When you feel coherent in your heart, send gratitude, love and positive energy out to the gathering. On a friendly note – don’t be unrealistic about sending positive energy out. Keep in mind the attitudes of others have a lot to do with outcomes. However sending love and care benefits your system and can increase the ratio of positive outcomes in situations.

So this holiday when we find ourselves sitting down for dinner, remember we’re feeding more than our bodies, we’re feeding the field environment too. The more we can refresh our own inner attitudes, balance and coherence the more we can enjoy the savory feelings of gratitude, the deliciousness of kindness, and the sweetness of deeper heart connections. Bon Appéti!

Take care,
Your Friends at HeartMath

Love the Heart Hero In You

The holiday spirit can bring out the heart hero in many of us. We feel inspired to be more charitable and help others. We find ourselves giving in the ways of favors, time, presents, visits, money and our services and more. Giving nurtures the heart and soul in us as well as those we give to. Yet to enjoy the holidays without becoming overwhelmed, over stretched and over committed we want to call on our inner heart hero for help.

This holiday season ask yourself what is your giving sweet spot? What can you do freely without overlooking your own balance? Even the most generous of hearts can sometimes use a gentle reminder to practice self-care so we can remain resilient throughout the holiday season.

Here are a few tips to care for the hero inside you:

  1. Remember to make yourself a priority. Building inner resilience requires self-care. Call on your inner heart hero to help make it happen. Make a commitment to do at least one nurturing activity a week—starting now.
  2. Remember to give yourself a break! Use your heart hero power to trade negative self-talk for self-kindness. Negative thoughts use precious energy that could go towards something productive. Replace them with positive, compassionate messages to give a real boost to your self-worth.
  3. Match body and mind. The mind and body are so interconnected that even our heart rhythms reflect what we’re feeling. Intentionally shift your heart rhythms to a coherent pattern to increase inner peace and ease throughout the holiday season. The Inner Balance™ app and the emWave2® device are tools to teach you how.
  4. Create a positive self-mantra. Choose a simple short phrase; repeat it every day. A mantra should speak to the emotional experience of what you’d like to create inside.
    • I am loving and kind towards myself first. This allows me to give to others from my place of balance.
    • Honoring and making time for my inner stillness practice will deepen my heart connection with others.
    • I appreciate myself for all that I am and all that I am becoming.
  5. Let it go! When interactions or situations trigger flared responses that send the mind on a negative tangent, ask your inner hero if this is really a good use of your energy and time? Use the Quick Coherence technique to realign with your authentic heart and shift to a more neutral approach.

Giving from the heart can be uplifting and deeply rewarding, just remember, you deserve the same heroic spirit—compassion, love, patience, and forgiveness—that you give to others.

Take care,
Your Friends at HeartMath

Heart Heroes Shaping the Future

Larry Schwenneker went through many rough periods in his life – which in his youth included being involved with the wrong crowd and heading down destructive paths.

Larry was a Heart Hero to himself first by starting to heal himself from a lifetime of anger, depression and anxiety as a result of the various traumas in his life. The healing started for Larry when he was introduced to HeartMath as part of his treatment for a brain injury.

While he knows that time doesn’t necessarily reduce past trauma, he found the HeartMath tools and technology very helpful in managing the effects of the brain injury and softening the triggers of the past. Whereas other therapies such as cognitive behavior therapy and Gestalt had some benefit, HeartMath was instrumental in dealing with the anger, anxiety and depression that Larry had been experiencing for the better part of his life.

Today Larry is a HeartMath® Certified Coach and he’s using his past experiences, combined with his knowledge of HeartMath, as a way to speak to and reach young people. Larry works with young people, teaching them how they can peacefully resolve conflicts and develop healthy relationships in their communities. He says, “People don’t need to live like they do, but they do because they don’t know any better. If it can change me, it can change anybody!”

Now Larry is their Heart Hero. Using tools to empower a younger generation, he is helping them learn how they can navigate through life by using their own heart intelligence. “When they experience success, they have a willingness to practice.”

Our amazing team of certified coach mentors, like Larry, are truly Heart Heroes. They’re out in force empowering people of all ages with proven methods for creating a richer, happier life by learning how to tap into their own heart power.

In light of our celebration of Heart Heroes, we want to honor Larry and all of our HeartMath Certified Coaches and Mentors for the inspiring work they’re doing and for helping to create a heart-based world.

Here’s to the Heart Hero in You! – Your Friends at HeartMath

5 Tips to be Your own Heart Hero

Make yourself a priority too.

How often do you do something nurturing for yourself? For many people, they may struggle to do it even once a month. Recognize that building our inner resilience requires self-care. How about making “you” a priority starting now?

Call on your inner heart hero to make it happen. Make a commitment to do at least one nurturing activity a week to care for yourself. More would be better but your inner heart hero will appreciate this as a starting point!


Give yourself a break!

We really can be hard on ourselves. Instead, use your hero power to trade negative self-talk for a little self-kindness. Whether it’s a quick passing criticism or an ongoing dialogue that’s negative – they both use precious energy that could go towards something productive.

Here’s an example how to replace the down slants – if the negative thought is, “I’m so stupid; I should know how to do this by now.” Stop the thought and replace it with a positive, compassionate message such as, “I’m still learning how to do this. No worries, I’ll get it down soon.” One week of genuine practice with this can give a real boost to our self-worth, and you’ll have yourself to appreciate for it.


Match Body and Mind.

Through science and technology you can now easily learn how to make changes to your mental and physical state. The mind and body is so interconnected that even our heart rhythms reflect what we’re feeling.

Learning to intentionally shift your heart rhythms to what is called a coherent pattern, can help to increase the amount of inner peace and ease you experience – and who couldn’t use a little more of that! The Inner Balance® and the emWave2® devices are tools to teach you how. They’re a proven method for minimizing stress and increasing personal resilience.


Create a Positive Self-Mantra.

This simple exercise can help maintain the awareness of something you want to change. Choose a simple short phrase; repeat it to yourself every day. Do it when you’re getting ready in the morning or when you’re driving. Do it to replace the old negative self-talk that want to occupy your quiet spaces. Create a mantra that really speaks to the emotional experience of what you want to create inside. A mantra might be something like:

  • I am loving and kind towards myself first. Then I have more I can give to others.
  • I do not take things personally. I am secure in myself.
  • I know I am of value. I don’t require others to enforce this for me.
  • I appreciate myself for all that I am and all that I am becoming.

Let it go!

You’ve likely heard this before – let the small stuff go. Sure certain things can trigger all of us and ignite the mind on a fiery tangent. Whether it’s something someone said, or something someone did or didn’t do. When this happens ask your inner hero is this worth my energy and time? Is mulling this over helping me become a better person? When you can’t quite shake it off consider taking a heart-focus break.

Use the Quick Coherence technique to realign with your authentic heart – your inner hero. If there truly is something that needs addressed, you’ll be glad your inner hero chose to shift the reaction first so you could have more of a neutral position in your approach.

A Big Lesson for any Parent

Parenthood has taught me a lot. One of the biggest lessons presented itself not very long after my son was born: The importance of letting go.

I’ve had to learn to let go and let him sleep in his own room; let go and let him cross the street to play; let go and let him walk to school; let go and let him choose his clothes, his wife, his own path. It’s a life-long process and I still have times I have to remind myself, hey, this is not about me, is it?

It’s easy to worry, feel disappointed, be irritated or get annoyed by someone’s actions or choices because they aren’t what we want or expect or what we think we know is right. It’s easy to see others and operate more from our own perspective or agenda rather than what is needed or important or best for the other person. And sometimes, when we do get what we want, we discover it wasn’t the best of all possibilities after all.

Expectations are like icebergs. Whether it’s the actions we expect co-workers to take, the recognition we think we deserve, or the careers we want our children to choose, we rarely see the depth of possibilities that exist just beneath the surface. When we attach ourselves to one outcome, we can’t see all that might eventually emerge if we just let it go.

We can save a tremendous amount of energy when we accept that people will not always act as expected or in ways that suit us. This doesn’t mean losing control; it means acknowledging that in most cases we’re not in control and don’t need to be for things to turn out okay.

Accept the unpredictable nature of life. Let go of expectations and view the world around you from a new and more spontaneous perspective. Be more flexible and ready to adapt and respond to whatever may come your way with more intelligence, more creativity and more balance.

Expect only the unexpected!

Take care,
Kim Allen

The Power of Emotions

An important first step is to become more aware of how you feel. Many people go through the whole day registering emotions only on a surface level, unaware of the emotional undercurrents affecting their thoughts and perceptions.

In order to gain new insight about your emotions you need to become more aware of what’s going on in your feeling world. This isn’t hard to do, but does require slowing down from time-to-time and taking stock.

You’ll discover new things about your emotional patterns and what triggers less desirable emotions in you. This new emotional self-awareness provides the foundation for learning what needs to be shifted.

To help with this try the Notice and Ease™ tool.

Notice and Ease is the basic tool for identifying and neutralizing unwanted emotions. You can learn to release a lot of disturbed feelings and stop their energy drain by doing the following simple steps:

The Notice and Ease Tool:

1: Notice and admit what you are feeling.

In the first step, to simply notice and admit what you are feeling requires slowing down and taking stock.

2: Try to name the feeling.

In the second, try to name the feeling—like anxious, depressed, frustrated, a vague discomfort, and so on. Just naming the feeling to yourself helps you to admit what you are feeling.

3: Tell yourself to e-a-s-e as you gently focus in your heart, relax as you breathe, and e-a-s-e the stress out.

Lastly, as you tell yourself to ease in your heart, relax and ease the stressful emotion out, just feel as if the unwanted emotion is leaving your system. Don’t force it out; just ease it out.

Use Notice and Ease when you find yourself feeling tense, edgy, overwhelmed, worried, or any undesirable emotion. As you become able to manage your emotions, it will give you much greater power to achieve goals while increasing enjoyment and fulfillment in your life.

6 Tips to Inspire a Change of Heart

Ask yourself, “What makes my heart come alive?”

What in your work inspires you, and what has become dry and stale? What in your relationships inspires you, and what has grown stagnant or contentious? What in your personal life gives you great fulfillment, and what has become routine?

By reflecting on these questions, you’ll give yourself a jump-start to a new level of inspiration, energy, vitality and purpose in your life.


Be open and excited to explore new things.

An attitude of willingness — openness to all that life brings — encourages qualities like curiosity, humility, flexibility, and receptivity. Dr. Brene Brown has said that “vulnerability [is] uncertainty, risk and emotional exposure. To be human is to be in vulnerability.” We’re shown a way forward that we might never have come up with on our own. This is the inspirational power of willingness.


Be playful …. seriously.

Now that you’ve settled into adulthood and are doing all the right things for your career and family, remember not to lose the playfulness that made childhood carefree, adventure-filled and spontaneous. Playfulness brings flexibility and the ability to flow with life, instead of resisting, collapsing, or retreating. These qualities get even more important as the years go by.

Playfulness is the kinetic energy that ignites creativity and attracts more inspiration. When you remember not to take life too seriously, you avoid needless drama when a situation requires calm. Laughing at ourselves over our limitations and our humanness — these are hallmarks of playfulness.


Be yourself.

Why not let the example of others inspire you as you find your own way in life? The ability to be oneself, transparently and unashamedly, is one of the most important ingredients of an inspired life. Authenticity attracts the power to re-create ourselves in the face of crises and challenges. Being authentic empowers us to say what needs to be said, and do what needs to be done. Living authentically brings a refreshing breeze to stale relationships and worn-out attitudes, a new freedom to be who we really are.


Do something that inspires you every day.

Are you playing with your pets or your kids enough? Are you taking walks or hikes or bike rides in nature enough? Are you still reading poetry that inspires you? Do you make time for a great conversation with a close friend? If the answer is “no” to very many of these inspiration questions, your inspiration quotient is probably not nearly what it could be. You can change it!


Be appreciative for what you have in your life.

There’s so much beauty in life, in nature, why not go on a appreciation hunt? Seriously … make a list of everything in your life you’re grateful for. The people you love, the heroes you admire, particular places you love to visit, favorite activities, …. come on, this is getting fun! Creating an appreciation list has its own momentum that becomes irresistible.

Sure, your mind can come in with doubt and negativity. But the world can do that, so why bother?!

Awaken inspiration in your life every day and see what happens. See what new friends appear, what new opportunities, what new insights can turn a tough problem into a creative challenge. And then appreciate all your newfound wisdom and energy.

Top Tips for Better Sleep

Manage the Stress in Your Life

It’s very important to understand that what we do during the day affects how we sleep at night. When we allow overwhelm or stress to accumulate in our system during the day, it throws off our body’s natural rhythms. Practicing stress management techniques during the day and right before going to bed can help you get a better night’s sleep.

Steps for Quick Coherence Technique:

Step 1: Focus your attention in the area of the heart. Imagine your breath is flowing in and out of your heart or chest area, breathing a little slower and deeper than usual.

Suggestion: Inhale 5 seconds, exhale 5 seconds (or whatever rhythm is comfortable)

Step 2: Make a sincere attempt to experience a regenerative feeling such as appreciation or care for someone or something in your life.

Suggestion: Try to re-experience the feeling you have for someone you love, a pet, a special place, an accomplishment, etc. or focus on a feeling of calm or ease.

Consider Your Daily Activities

To clear the stress accumulations, take a walk outside in fresh air or do some other type of exercise during the day. These activities release endorphins and other uplifting hormones while recharging your energy.

Gradually reduce the amount of caffeine you drink during the day. Allow your body to reset its own regenerative rhythms so that you don’t depend on stimulants to keep you going. Drink plenty of water to keep hydrated and flush out toxins from your system.

Replace Unwanted Emotions and Attitudes during the Day

Clearing emotional reactions, like irritation, worry, anxiety, judgments and blame as you go through the day, is important as they may be keeping you awake at night. When you notice that you have a stressful attitude use the following technique with the intention of creating and holding new attitudes like non-judgment, care, patience, appreciation or compassion.

If volunteering is a satisfying activity for you, find the appropriate outlet for yourself and schedule time to give to others. Consider your needs on mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical levels, and alternate with different activities to nurture all facets. For example, an athlete might combine physical exercise with volunteering by coaching a sports team, or anyone interested in learning skills she’s mastered. The following are examples of replacement attitudes:

Unwanted Feelings/AttitudesReplacement Feelings/Attitudes
AnxietyBreathe calm and balance.
Feeling OverwhelmedBreathe ease and peace.
Sadness or depressionBreathe appreciation and non-judgment.
GuiltBreathe compassion
WorryBreathe care

Attitude Breathing® — a HeartMath Emotional Management Technique

Step 1: Recognize an unwanted attitude: a feeling or attitude that you want to change. This could be things like worry, anxiety, frustration, anger, self-judgment, blame, guilt.

Step 2: Identify and breathe an attitude that would be a counter balance to the one you want to change. This is called a replacement attitude. Select a positive attitude, and then breathe the feeling of that new attitude slowly and casually through your heart area. Do this for a while to anchor the new replacement feeling.

Introduce Positive Pre-Sleep Habits

– Refrain from watching stimulating TV programs, playing video games or other similar activities at least an hour before bed. Instead watch quiet, soothing TV (nature programs), read inspirational material or engage in other calming activities.

– Simplify your to-do-lists to create less mental clutter. Cut out what you don’t have to do. A note pad to park those late night ideas may also be helpful.

– Limit the amount of liquid consumed before bed so you don’t have to wake up to go to the bathroom during the night

– Create a positive environment for sleep including a good mattress, quiet peaceful room, and think about removing that bright digital clock. Consider taking a warm bath and listening to soothing music before bed.

Eric’s Story of Sleeplessness and What he Did to Build his Resilience

“I don’t think I’m exaggerating when I say that the Heart Lock-In saved my marriage—and possibly my life,” says Eric, age 35. “A year ago, I started a new company. My wife and 2-year-old daughter and I were the perfect postcard family, complete with my wife’s belly-bump of our expected son. Then, shortly after our new little guy was born, the world pretty much blew up in my face.

We expected a month or two of sleepless nights, which we experienced when our daughter was born. But it was soon clear that this new baby was a whole different story. We started calling him ‘the sleepless wonder.’ We talked to the pediatrician and he told us that it’s more and more common for infants to sleep sporadically and very little.

By the time the baby was six months old my ‘perfect’ life was in tatters. My wife was exhausted, our now-3-year-old was acting out in jealous anger at her brother’s constant intrusion into her world, our once-tidy house was in shambles, and I had dark circles under my eyes that looked like I was back on the football field in college with shiners painted on to catch the sun. I had paced many miles around our living room, all night long, night after night, trying to soothe a crying, restless baby while my wife pleaded with me to let her sleep so she could face the next day. After a while, my body went through a change and I developed a new pattern—the inability to sleep even when I had the opportunity. My new business was floundering and I was too tired to know what to do about it. The stress was taking a toll.

Then a friend turned me on to the Heart Lock-In technique and showed me how to do it. She’s a HeartMath coach, and explained the physiological benefits and gave me a HeartMath music CD called Quiet Joy. When I did my first Heart Lock-In, I fell into what seemed like a coma, that’s how deeply I conked out. She explained that that was natural at first, given my state of fatigue, but that I would soon be more in control.

I tried it some more and within a week, I had a whole new routine for my once sleepless nights. I would take the baby, kiss my wife and daughter goodnight as they settled in for their evening cuddle time together, and go out to the living room. I’d put Quiet Joy on endless loop, and settle my son close to me while I did evening chores and wind-down activities. Then, I’d get both of us ready for bed and lay back with him in my recliner, baby boy on my chest, secure in a sling. I would do a deep Heart Lock-In, radiating love and appreciation for my family—my wife, daughter, and son—and he and I would both drift off.

He’d wake up a time or two in the night, needing a bottle or change. But I wasn’t a sleepwalking zombie anymore. The Heart Lock-In helped me gain an entirely new approach to sleeplessness, and in fact, to life. I’m not kidding—it changed everything for me. My wife and daughter are regaining their balance and I have hope that things will level out for our family again, in a new and better way. I’m more productive in my new business, too. Hard to believe one simple technique could help accomplish all this. But that’s the Heart Lock-In for you!”

Warm Regards,
Eric

One Coach Shares Her Resilience Story Using the emWave® Pro

coherent heart wave

“I’m Bonnie Thompson and I’m a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach and Certified HeartMath Coach. In my coaching practice I specialize in two areas: Resilience and Highly Sensitive Persons (HSPs). I have worked with clients from all over the world for many years, helping them to live more authentic and centered lives.

I became involved with HeartMath® over 15 years ago when I began practicing the tools and techniques to deal with a very stressful time of my life. I have said many times that it was HeartMath that got me through it all.

In April of this year I had eye surgery and I was in a lot of pain and not sleeping well. I have occasional benign arrhythmias that get worse the more sleep deprived I become. It’s always been interesting to me that my heart becomes so irregular without good, solid sleep. I think everyone’s body gets very stressed without adequate sleep, and in my case using the emWave® Pro clearly demonstrates this.

The first graph is a screen shot of my HeartMath emWave session the day after my surgery. Even though I was unable to get into coherence, I persisted. I continued to practice the HeartMath tools several times a day throughout my recovery and a week later my HRV pattern was reflected in the second graph.

Graph 1: emWave session the day after surgery

Bonnie Thompsons unfortunate heart rate variability after surgery

Graph 2: emWave session after a week of use

Bonnie Thompsons improved heart rate variability after using heartmath techniques

These two graphs from the emWave Pro represent two extremes but for me they also represent progress. First, being able to see what lack of sleep does to me was very instructive and I even showed this to my doctor. And second, even though measurable coherence was difficult right after surgery I stuck with the practices. By doing so I believe I was able to speed up my recovery and my HRV reflects that progress. I have been very inspired by this experience and I hope to be able to reduce my incidences of arrhythmias over time. I am so grateful for the HeartMath technologies that allow me to see in real time what is going on in my body, mind and emotions!!

Regards,
Bonnie Thompson

Bonnie Thompsons improved heart rate variability after using heartmath techniques

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